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Forums > Active Threads > General Tractor Discussions > Just For Fun Off Topic

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AndyDaniels
Join Date: Feb 2018
Posts: 15 Tampa, Florida
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2018-02-13          197508


Hey, fellas! I've created this thread for us to share a few full-hearted laughs, something to lighten up the day when the going gets rough or you just needed something to pick you up from a gloomy day. Let me start this up with a few shorts:

Scientists finally found out, how much sleep humans exactly need..

...just five more minutes.

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AndyDaniels
Join Date: Feb 2018
Posts: 15 Tampa, Florida
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2018-02-13          197509


This new thesaurus I bought is the worst..

Not only is it terrible, it's terrible. ....

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AndyDaniels
Join Date: Feb 2018
Posts: 15 Tampa, Florida
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2018-02-13          197510


A grasshopper walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Hey, we have a drink named after you!"

The grasshopper looks surprised and asks, "You have a drink named Steve?" ....

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minimac
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 70
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2018-02-14          197511


Thanks Andy

Here are two from now gone Allen and Rossi.


Allen: My wifes a twin
Rossi: How do you tell them apart?
Allen: Her brothers taller

Allen: I do everything my wife tells me.
Rossi: You mean if she told you to jump
off the roof of this hotel you would?
Allen: Not again. ....

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Murf
Join Date: Dec 1999
Posts: 7141 Toronto Area, Ontario, Canada
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2018-02-20          197527


A famous dog trainer is being interviewed by a reporter, the reporter is amazed at the abilities of the dog

The reporter asks is there ANYTHING you cannot teach this dog to do?

The trainer replies Dance. It seems he has 2 left feet. ....

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AndyDaniels
Join Date: Feb 2018
Posts: 15 Tampa, Florida
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2018-02-21          197529


Hahaha! Just keep 'em coming, fellas!

What is a pirate's favorite letter?

"P"

Without it, they'd be irate. ....

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AndyDaniels
Join Date: Feb 2018
Posts: 15 Tampa, Florida
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2018-02-21          197530


My friend set me up on a date. He told me she constantly make "Shrek" references. I was pretty sceptical..

But then I saw her face.. ....

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AndyDaniels
Join Date: Feb 2018
Posts: 15 Tampa, Florida
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2018-02-21          197531


Metallica and Nonmetallica should come together..

To form an ionic band. ....

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yocsr1
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 174 Terre Haute, Indiana
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2018-02-21          197537


If you buy half a chicken does that mean your secretly sharing a meal with someone else? ....

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Woodie
Join Date: Jun 2004
Posts: 104 Michigan lower
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2018-02-25          197540


I started the rum diet, works great, lost three days already. ....

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Woodie
Join Date: Jun 2004
Posts: 104 Michigan lower
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2018-02-25          197541


Know Whats a bad day for a dung beetle?

....

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AndyDaniels
Join Date: Feb 2018
Posts: 15 Tampa, Florida
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2018-03-09          197561


Quote:
Originally Posted by Woodie | view 197541
Know Whats a bad day for a dung beetle?


What would that be, Woodie? :) ....

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AndyDaniels
Join Date: Feb 2018
Posts: 15 Tampa, Florida
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2018-03-09          197562


Why don't vegans take risks?

Because their life could be at steak. ....

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AndyDaniels
Join Date: Feb 2018
Posts: 15 Tampa, Florida
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2018-03-09          197563


What do you call a Mexican that is only 46?

Paragraph. He is too short to be an essay. ....

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Woodie
Join Date: Jun 2004
Posts: 104 Michigan lower
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2018-03-09          197564


Quote:
Originally Posted by AndyDaniels | view 197561
What would that be, Woodie? :) ...

"No s***" ;-) ....

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DennisCTB
Join Date: Nov 1998
Posts: 2644 NorthWest NJ
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2018-03-11          197571


Billboard in front of church:

If You Are Waiting For A Sign That You Ought To Be Going To Church!
This Is It.
....

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Murf
Join Date: Dec 1999
Posts: 7141 Toronto Area, Ontario, Canada
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2018-03-11          197574


An old fella goes to the doctor for his annual checkup. The doctor asks about all the usual potential issues and gets favourable answers to all of them. In winding up the visit the doctor asks the old codger if he’s having any issues.

He replies “Yes, I have a little problem with my bowel movements.”

“Oh, too loose or constipation?” asks the doctor.

“Neither, just right, and at almost exactly 8am every morning.” he replies.

“So then what’s the problem? People half your age would kill to be that regular.” the doctor asks.

“I rarely wake up before 9am.” he replies. ....

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Woodie
Join Date: Jun 2004
Posts: 104 Michigan lower
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2018-03-11          197575


Just heard playing Euchre has been banned... reason...can't call trump anymore.
---------
Just passing them on as i hear'em ....

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